Saturday, June 23, 2007
something to ponder...
Several excerpts from the book "Waking the Dead"…this is the same author who said in a different book that "In the heart of every man is a desire for a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to rescue." (I skipped around a lot and paraphrased the book in a few places, jus wanted to give you a taste of just a few of the things it talks about that reads like an action novel and wakes you up. Hope you go and get your own copy and read it my friends…)
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"Consider the tale told in the book of Daniel, chapter 10… Something has happened that Daniel doesn't understand. I think we can all relate to that. We don't understand about 90 percent of what happens to us, either. Daniel is troubled. He sets out to get an answer. But three weeks of prayer and fasting produce no results. What is he to conclude? If Daniel were like most people, by this point he'd probably be headed toward one of two conclusions: I'm blowing it or God is holding out on me. He might try confessing every sin and petty offense in hopes of opening up the lines of communication with God. Or he might withdraw into a sort of disappointed resignation, drop the fast, and turn on the television….. He might read a book on the "silence of God". That's the way the people I know handle this sort of thing. And he would be dead wrong. ....
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On the twenty-first day of the fast an angel shows up, out of breath. In sort of apology, the angel explains to Daniel that God had actually dispatched him in answer to Daniel's prayers the very first day he prayed – three weeks ago. (There goes the whole unanswered prayer thesis, right out the window.) Three weeks ago? What is Daniel to do with that? "The very first day? But.. I'e.. I mean, thank you so very much, and I don't want to seem ungrateful, but … where have you been?" You haven't blown it, Daniel, and God isn't holding out on you. The angel goes to explain that he was locked in hand to hand combat with a mighty fallen angel, a demonic power of dreadful strength, who kept him out o the Persian kingdom for three weeks, and he finally had to get Michael (the great archangel, the captain of the Lord's hosts) to come and help him break through enemy lines. "Now I am here to answer your prayer. Sorry it's taken so long".....
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There is eternal truth number two: this is a world at war. We live in a far more dramatic, far more dangerous story than we ever imagined. The reason we love The Chronicles of Narnia or Star Wars or the Matrix or Lord of the Rings is that they are telling us something about our lives that we never, ever get on the evening news. Or from most pulpits. ….Things are not what they seem. This is a world at war.....
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… You see this throughout scripture, a little boy will slay the giant, a loudmouthed fisherman who can't hold down a job will lead the church, and a whore with a golden heart is the one to perform the deed that Jesus asked us to tell wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world (Mark 14:9). Things are not what they seem. We are not what we seem…..You are not what you think you are. There is a glory to your life that your Enemy fears, and is hell-bent on destroying that glory before you can act on it. ....
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… Things happen to you. The car breaks down, you have a fight with your spouse, or you suddenly figure out how to fix a problem at work. What is really happening? David Whyte says that we live our lives under a pale sky, "the lost sense that we play out our lives as part of a greater story" What sort of tale have I fallen into? … Where is your heart? ....
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"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. – King Solomon (son of King David). (Prov. 4:23)....
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……. Next chapter Paraphrase:....
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The wizard of oz the movie left something out the book had. How the tin man became made of tin. He was in love with a beautiful maiden but could not marry her until he had enough money to build them a cottage in the woods. So he worked very hard to get the money, but the wicked witch hated his love for the maiden and cast a spell on him to have many injuries. His injuries caused parts of his body to replaced with tin, but at first it seemed to be to his advantage, his metal frame allowed him to work nearly as powerfully as a machine. Eventually so much of him had been replaced that he lost his heart, and his will to marry the maiden. "The greatest loss I had ever known was the lost of my heart". So we went to find the wizard to restore his heart. "While I was in love I was the happiest man on earth; but no one can love who has no heart, and so I am resolved to Oz to give me one. If he does, I will go back to the maiden and marry her." ....
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….. We, too, have suffered a series of blows over time. And we too, have seized efficiency, busyness, and productivity as the life we lead instead. Now we are lost. Dazed. Alert and oriented times zero. Sleepwalking through life. In order to find our way out of these woods, we must return to our heart. The heart is central.....
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Your enemy (satan) knows that if he can disable or deaden your heart, then he has effectively foiled the plan of God, which was to create a world where love reigns. By taking out your heart, the Enemy takes out you, and you are essential to the story. You'll notice he's been rather effective. ....
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Why do so many relationships fail? Because one or both partners no longer have a heart for making it work. On and on it goes. …. We gave our heart away and now we can't get it back. ....
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…. That's why those who live from their minds are detached from life. …. They conclude others are emotional and unstable. Meanwhile, those that live from the heart find those who live from the mind… unavailable. …. ....
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…. Equating the heart with emotion is the same nonsense as saying that love is a feeling. Surely, we know that love is more than a feeling.....
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….You'll notice that those who live from the mind shed few tears. I wonder if that isn't the real reason they choose to hide there. For when we're honest, we'll admit that there are our stated reasons for doing any of the things we do, and then there are our real reasons. We call the our motives.....
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….Their actions looked good but their motives were not. A person's character is determined by his motives, and motives are always a matte of the heart. ....
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.. It takes courage to love doesn't it? It takes courage to trust someone with your life. ....
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…. Success or failure (in relationships) can be pretty well predicated by the degree to which the heart is fully in it. ....
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… The heart is the connecting point, the meeting place between any two persons. The kind of deep soul intimacy we crave with God and with others can be experienced only from the heart. We don't want to be someone's project; we want to be the desire of their heart. … "By worshipping efficiency, the human race has achieved the highest level of efficiency in history, but how much have we grown in love?"....
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…. You can not be the person God meant you to be, and you cannot live the life he meant you to live, unless you live from the heart.
....His plan (the enemy) from the beginning was to assault the heart, just as the Wicked Witch did to the Tin Woodman. Make them so busy, they ignore the heart. Wound them so deeply they won't want a heart. Twist their theology, so they despise their heart. Take away their courage.
.... Of course your heart would be the object of a great and fierce battle. It is your most precious possession. .... Without your heart you cannot have love. Without your heart you cannot have faith. Without heart you cannot find the work you were meant to do. In other words, without your heart you cannot have life.
.... We must fight for the life that God intends for us.
Friday, October 8, 2010
relationship personallity test
Part 1:
With your strong degree of confidence, it’s no surprise that you get along well with most people. Indeed, it’s self-confidence that allows people to feel comfortable interacting with others without feeling insecure and vulnerable. For this reason, you shouldn’t have much difficulty in romance, at least not initially. Your social skills will likely help relieve any anxiety your romantic partners might have on those first few dates. However, over time, the high standards that you have for yourself could potentially frustrate your partner.
Given how much you value family life, you probably get along best with people who share your values and beliefs. In fact, it’s likely that you maintain close connections with members of your immediate and distant family. For this reason, you would probably be most satisfied in a romantic relationship with someone who also values domestic life. Being in a relationship with someone who enjoys going out to parties and staying-up late at night might be fun, at least initially; yet it’s likely that you will find this tiring over time. Thus, it might be easier and more satisfying for you to develop a long-lasting relationship with a person who also enjoys spending time at home and desires starting a family. On first dates, perhaps you might suggest to your partner that the two of you spend a quiet night having dinner at one of your respective homes instead of going out to a restaurant or club.
As someone who is more relaxed than most people, you’re likely be attracted to most people. However, your free-spirited nature might make being in a relationship with a person that is more rigid than you difficult because you might perceive the person as being too uptight and controlling. For this reason, you may ultimately be most satisfied in a relationship with someone that is shares your level of self-control.
Your openness probably makes it easy for you to respect and appreciate people that are different from you. However, when it comes to romantic relationships, your openness might make it difficult for you to tolerate people that cannot appreciate diversity as much as you. Therefore, you may be happiest in serious relationships with people that share your open-mindedness. But, your openness might occasionally cause a certain degree of dependency on your end because you may be so open that you easily adopt the preferences and habits of your partners and gradually relinquish things that make you so unique.
Part 2:
Interdependence refers to how much you need dependency or a "couple identity" with your partner. You are highly interdependent in relationships. This means that you desire – and perhaps even demand – a substantial degree of physical and emotional connection with a partner and other loved ones. Those connections and interactions can be frequent and superficial or they can be deep and meaningful. And you are probably attracted quickly to someone who you can deeply respect and even emulate to a degree. In fact, it is typical for a person in this score range to consider how a particular romantic partner might reflect on his/her own family and friends. All of this does not mean that you do not need personal space now and then; nearly everyone values being unique and different from others in some respects. However, people in this range draw considerable strength, comfort and sense of identity from close relationships. You like to know about virtually all aspects of your partner’s life. Thus, when you feel close to someone this person becomes an extremely important part of who you are on the inside and outside. You probably prefer that you and your partner’s recreational activities be shared together since you like having your partner physically close and desire showing off your "couplehood" in public.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who responds to the fact that you enjoy the reassurance of physical contact and emotional sharing, but who helps keeps dependency in check in the relationship so that you two do not lose your identities as individuals and whose character is deserving of your loyalty and affection.
==============================================
Intimacy refers to the how much you need emotional closeness with your partner. You are clearly comfortable with giving and receiving emotional intimacy. You long for emotional closeness and security with a special person, and you tend to be open with a partner in return. That openness includes lessons learned from your past experiences and relationships, extending trust, believing your partner returns your feelings and devotion and being generally comfortable with surrendering yourself to a partner. In fact, you probably would feel uncomfortable if there were serious secrets between you and your partner. Likewise, you probably regard a partner as your best friend and your foremost confidant. There is likely no hesitation discussing current problems or concerns with that person. It also seems that you have realistic expectations for a committed relationship. However, you may find yourself wondering whether your partner’s feelings are equally as strong as yours. Still, people in this scoring range are willing to take the risks associated with being vulnerable on many levels.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who desires and reciprocates intimacy as much as you do.
===================================
Self-Efficacy refers to your self-image, stability of mood and level of motivation. People at your scoring level feel assertive and expressive most of the time and strive to maintain a positive attitude. You likely find that having plans and structured goals help motivates and guides your personal and professional development. Many people in this scoring range are visionary in their ambitions, but they can be highly self critical. Indeed, you are likely to be acutely aware of your own strengths and weaknesses. Therefore, it probably helps for you to hear praise and recognition, as well as have measurable goals and benchmarks in order to feel competent in your decisions and actions and to achieve a strong sense of accomplishment.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who is extremely supportive of your goals by showing patience and a positive outlook and who also frequently acknowledges and praises your small and large accomplishments.
=======================================
Relationship Readiness refers to how prepared you are emotionally, psychologically and pragmatically for a committed relationship. You seem to have a good foundation and appear pretty much ready and willing to find a committed relationship. In fact, most people in this scoring range have a clear vision and a sense of purpose for their life. They have the ability to connect with others, they have well defined ideas about where their life is headed and they are assertive and resourceful in meeting their goals. Therefore, you likely feel in control and are able to take charge and go after what you want in life and in a relationship. Your housekeeping is also probably in check – meaning that you do not have any negative baggage that can weigh down a relationship, like financial or legal problems or emotional, health or family issues. As such, you do not seem to be seeking a relationship primarily to fill a void in your life or to gain a feeling of acceptance and belonging that was weakened or lost due to other relationships that ended or disappointed you. Rather, it seems to be that you are striving for a balance in your life and that now includes wanting to offer everything you can to a partner.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who wants a relationship, rather than needs one to feel personally fulfilled.
====================================================
Communication refers to your approach to interpersonal interactions and level of emotional intelligence. Effective communicators have strong emotional intelligence, and you seem to have an excellent level of emotional intelligence. It is expected that you show considerable tolerance of ambiguity and emotional expression. You have the capacity for being extremely sensitive to other’s feelings and to their body language. Those who know you well would probably describe you as patient and eager to listen to others. People in this scoring range are also not afraid of making or admitting to mistakes. They consistently and bravely show vulnerability to others. In fact, they are keenly aware how their behavior impacts others. You can communicate your needs and feelings honestly when someone engages you directly, but you may not always take the initiative to be assertive with others. In this sense, it is likely that you seek to understand others, rather than seek for others to understand you.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who will not put up emotional barriers when you seek to understand his/her thoughts and feelings, but rather will communicate with you intimately and candidly.
===========================================
Conflict Resolution refers to your stress management and problem solving skills. Effective conflict resolution has nine general elements: View Conflict as Positive; Address Conflict in the Proper Atmosphere; Clarify Perceptions; Note Needs, not wants; Draw on the Power of a Positive Partnership; Focus on the Future, then learn from the past; Identify Options for Mutual Gain; Develop ’Doables’ or stepping stones to action; and Make Mutually-Beneficial Agreements. Your score indicates that you are fairly strong on all of these basic elements, except for Making Mutually-Beneficial Agreements. This suggests that you are very flexible and action-oriented when addressing problems, yet not so eager to find resolution that you settle for quick, temporary agreements. Settling on a temporary agreement is often a way of avoiding conflict, and it can lead to needs not being met. You do not seem to avoid conflict; instead you appear to evaluate the possible solutions and then actively engage your partner to work on a positive outcome for the relationship.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who will join you in taking time to find a complete and genuine resolution to issues as opposed to avoiding conflict by settling for quick, temporary agreements.
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Sexuality refers to your needs (frequency, boundaries, expressions) related to physical intimacy. Scientific models of love and attachment always include physical chemistry and sexuality. It is a crucial topic for any couple to address, because it involves issues of control and vulnerability. People at your scoring level have a firm sense of their sexual orientation, preferred sexual activities and comfort level. You like sex that is romantic, adventurous and fun, but for you sex is not just a casual event. Sex has great importance in your relationship, and it is reserved for someone you love. You may think your sexual preferences would be viewed as conservative by others, but you are hardly a prude. You tend to be very confident in your sexual ability, you are not self conscious in bed and you are open to try various activities. People in this scoring range are willing to be vulnerable and relinquish control in the bedroom to their partners. In other words, you are not sexually selfish. While you appreciate spontaneity and wild abandon in sex, you also seem to like for sex to be planned to some extent. Most times this probably reflects the fact that you like to set the mood, build anticipation and ensure you have privacy and no interruptions.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who regards sex as a meaningful bond between people in love and who appreciates when it is planned sometimes rather than always spontaneous. You also really like spontaneous sex.
===========================================
Attitudes Toward Love refers to your level of needs for romantic love and friendship love. There are two main types of love – Romantic Love and Companionate Love. Romantic Love is passionate, emotional and intense, whereas Companionate Love is a deep, affectionate attachment. People feel these two types of loves to different degrees in a relationship, and the levels of each can fluctuate over time. You scored as someone who may be best described as "a "hopeless romantic on the inside and a realist on the outside." This means that you value very highly both the safety, security and comfort of Companionate Love and the excitement and passion of Romantic Love. You desire someone who is on the same wavelength as you –sharing similar attitudes, moods and impulses. You are a clearly a hybrid, and someone who probably views love as a transcendent thing. That is, you regard true love as a precious and rare state that must be nurtured to grow and thrive. Most people in this scoring range believe that a passionate sex life is not the most important factor in a stable and satisfying relationship. Rather, a relationship must be nurtured with acceptance and compete connectedness with a partner – a couple building and possessively protecting their "own world."
***BOTTOM LINE: You need someone whose highest priority is your relationship and is willing to do the hard work to keep a transcendent level of love alive in the relationship.
=====================================
Flirting Styles that TURN ME ON:
1. Playful and natural (someone who lets the inner child shine through).
2. Witty (someone who draws you in with words and quick thinking).
3. Confident (people who are direct and zero in what they want and go for it).
Flirting Styles that TURN ME OFF:
1. Coy (someone who’s a little reclusive and who plays hard to get).
2. Manipulative (someone who sends mixed signals and leaves you wondering if they are interested in you or not – basically a person who is into the power dynamics that come with a relationship, and who will ultimately have the upper hand, especially in seducing each other).
With your strong degree of confidence, it’s no surprise that you get along well with most people. Indeed, it’s self-confidence that allows people to feel comfortable interacting with others without feeling insecure and vulnerable. For this reason, you shouldn’t have much difficulty in romance, at least not initially. Your social skills will likely help relieve any anxiety your romantic partners might have on those first few dates. However, over time, the high standards that you have for yourself could potentially frustrate your partner.
Given how much you value family life, you probably get along best with people who share your values and beliefs. In fact, it’s likely that you maintain close connections with members of your immediate and distant family. For this reason, you would probably be most satisfied in a romantic relationship with someone who also values domestic life. Being in a relationship with someone who enjoys going out to parties and staying-up late at night might be fun, at least initially; yet it’s likely that you will find this tiring over time. Thus, it might be easier and more satisfying for you to develop a long-lasting relationship with a person who also enjoys spending time at home and desires starting a family. On first dates, perhaps you might suggest to your partner that the two of you spend a quiet night having dinner at one of your respective homes instead of going out to a restaurant or club.
As someone who is more relaxed than most people, you’re likely be attracted to most people. However, your free-spirited nature might make being in a relationship with a person that is more rigid than you difficult because you might perceive the person as being too uptight and controlling. For this reason, you may ultimately be most satisfied in a relationship with someone that is shares your level of self-control.
Your openness probably makes it easy for you to respect and appreciate people that are different from you. However, when it comes to romantic relationships, your openness might make it difficult for you to tolerate people that cannot appreciate diversity as much as you. Therefore, you may be happiest in serious relationships with people that share your open-mindedness. But, your openness might occasionally cause a certain degree of dependency on your end because you may be so open that you easily adopt the preferences and habits of your partners and gradually relinquish things that make you so unique.
Part 2:
Interdependence refers to how much you need dependency or a "couple identity" with your partner. You are highly interdependent in relationships. This means that you desire – and perhaps even demand – a substantial degree of physical and emotional connection with a partner and other loved ones. Those connections and interactions can be frequent and superficial or they can be deep and meaningful. And you are probably attracted quickly to someone who you can deeply respect and even emulate to a degree. In fact, it is typical for a person in this score range to consider how a particular romantic partner might reflect on his/her own family and friends. All of this does not mean that you do not need personal space now and then; nearly everyone values being unique and different from others in some respects. However, people in this range draw considerable strength, comfort and sense of identity from close relationships. You like to know about virtually all aspects of your partner’s life. Thus, when you feel close to someone this person becomes an extremely important part of who you are on the inside and outside. You probably prefer that you and your partner’s recreational activities be shared together since you like having your partner physically close and desire showing off your "couplehood" in public.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who responds to the fact that you enjoy the reassurance of physical contact and emotional sharing, but who helps keeps dependency in check in the relationship so that you two do not lose your identities as individuals and whose character is deserving of your loyalty and affection.
==============================================
Intimacy refers to the how much you need emotional closeness with your partner. You are clearly comfortable with giving and receiving emotional intimacy. You long for emotional closeness and security with a special person, and you tend to be open with a partner in return. That openness includes lessons learned from your past experiences and relationships, extending trust, believing your partner returns your feelings and devotion and being generally comfortable with surrendering yourself to a partner. In fact, you probably would feel uncomfortable if there were serious secrets between you and your partner. Likewise, you probably regard a partner as your best friend and your foremost confidant. There is likely no hesitation discussing current problems or concerns with that person. It also seems that you have realistic expectations for a committed relationship. However, you may find yourself wondering whether your partner’s feelings are equally as strong as yours. Still, people in this scoring range are willing to take the risks associated with being vulnerable on many levels.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who desires and reciprocates intimacy as much as you do.
===================================
Self-Efficacy refers to your self-image, stability of mood and level of motivation. People at your scoring level feel assertive and expressive most of the time and strive to maintain a positive attitude. You likely find that having plans and structured goals help motivates and guides your personal and professional development. Many people in this scoring range are visionary in their ambitions, but they can be highly self critical. Indeed, you are likely to be acutely aware of your own strengths and weaknesses. Therefore, it probably helps for you to hear praise and recognition, as well as have measurable goals and benchmarks in order to feel competent in your decisions and actions and to achieve a strong sense of accomplishment.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who is extremely supportive of your goals by showing patience and a positive outlook and who also frequently acknowledges and praises your small and large accomplishments.
=======================================
Relationship Readiness refers to how prepared you are emotionally, psychologically and pragmatically for a committed relationship. You seem to have a good foundation and appear pretty much ready and willing to find a committed relationship. In fact, most people in this scoring range have a clear vision and a sense of purpose for their life. They have the ability to connect with others, they have well defined ideas about where their life is headed and they are assertive and resourceful in meeting their goals. Therefore, you likely feel in control and are able to take charge and go after what you want in life and in a relationship. Your housekeeping is also probably in check – meaning that you do not have any negative baggage that can weigh down a relationship, like financial or legal problems or emotional, health or family issues. As such, you do not seem to be seeking a relationship primarily to fill a void in your life or to gain a feeling of acceptance and belonging that was weakened or lost due to other relationships that ended or disappointed you. Rather, it seems to be that you are striving for a balance in your life and that now includes wanting to offer everything you can to a partner.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who wants a relationship, rather than needs one to feel personally fulfilled.
====================================================
Communication refers to your approach to interpersonal interactions and level of emotional intelligence. Effective communicators have strong emotional intelligence, and you seem to have an excellent level of emotional intelligence. It is expected that you show considerable tolerance of ambiguity and emotional expression. You have the capacity for being extremely sensitive to other’s feelings and to their body language. Those who know you well would probably describe you as patient and eager to listen to others. People in this scoring range are also not afraid of making or admitting to mistakes. They consistently and bravely show vulnerability to others. In fact, they are keenly aware how their behavior impacts others. You can communicate your needs and feelings honestly when someone engages you directly, but you may not always take the initiative to be assertive with others. In this sense, it is likely that you seek to understand others, rather than seek for others to understand you.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who will not put up emotional barriers when you seek to understand his/her thoughts and feelings, but rather will communicate with you intimately and candidly.
===========================================
Conflict Resolution refers to your stress management and problem solving skills. Effective conflict resolution has nine general elements: View Conflict as Positive; Address Conflict in the Proper Atmosphere; Clarify Perceptions; Note Needs, not wants; Draw on the Power of a Positive Partnership; Focus on the Future, then learn from the past; Identify Options for Mutual Gain; Develop ’Doables’ or stepping stones to action; and Make Mutually-Beneficial Agreements. Your score indicates that you are fairly strong on all of these basic elements, except for Making Mutually-Beneficial Agreements. This suggests that you are very flexible and action-oriented when addressing problems, yet not so eager to find resolution that you settle for quick, temporary agreements. Settling on a temporary agreement is often a way of avoiding conflict, and it can lead to needs not being met. You do not seem to avoid conflict; instead you appear to evaluate the possible solutions and then actively engage your partner to work on a positive outcome for the relationship.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who will join you in taking time to find a complete and genuine resolution to issues as opposed to avoiding conflict by settling for quick, temporary agreements.
=============================
Sexuality refers to your needs (frequency, boundaries, expressions) related to physical intimacy. Scientific models of love and attachment always include physical chemistry and sexuality. It is a crucial topic for any couple to address, because it involves issues of control and vulnerability. People at your scoring level have a firm sense of their sexual orientation, preferred sexual activities and comfort level. You like sex that is romantic, adventurous and fun, but for you sex is not just a casual event. Sex has great importance in your relationship, and it is reserved for someone you love. You may think your sexual preferences would be viewed as conservative by others, but you are hardly a prude. You tend to be very confident in your sexual ability, you are not self conscious in bed and you are open to try various activities. People in this scoring range are willing to be vulnerable and relinquish control in the bedroom to their partners. In other words, you are not sexually selfish. While you appreciate spontaneity and wild abandon in sex, you also seem to like for sex to be planned to some extent. Most times this probably reflects the fact that you like to set the mood, build anticipation and ensure you have privacy and no interruptions.
***BOTTOM LINE: you need someone who regards sex as a meaningful bond between people in love and who appreciates when it is planned sometimes rather than always spontaneous. You also really like spontaneous sex.
===========================================
Attitudes Toward Love refers to your level of needs for romantic love and friendship love. There are two main types of love – Romantic Love and Companionate Love. Romantic Love is passionate, emotional and intense, whereas Companionate Love is a deep, affectionate attachment. People feel these two types of loves to different degrees in a relationship, and the levels of each can fluctuate over time. You scored as someone who may be best described as "a "hopeless romantic on the inside and a realist on the outside." This means that you value very highly both the safety, security and comfort of Companionate Love and the excitement and passion of Romantic Love. You desire someone who is on the same wavelength as you –sharing similar attitudes, moods and impulses. You are a clearly a hybrid, and someone who probably views love as a transcendent thing. That is, you regard true love as a precious and rare state that must be nurtured to grow and thrive. Most people in this scoring range believe that a passionate sex life is not the most important factor in a stable and satisfying relationship. Rather, a relationship must be nurtured with acceptance and compete connectedness with a partner – a couple building and possessively protecting their "own world."
***BOTTOM LINE: You need someone whose highest priority is your relationship and is willing to do the hard work to keep a transcendent level of love alive in the relationship.
=====================================
Flirting Styles that TURN ME ON:
1. Playful and natural (someone who lets the inner child shine through).
2. Witty (someone who draws you in with words and quick thinking).
3. Confident (people who are direct and zero in what they want and go for it).
Flirting Styles that TURN ME OFF:
1. Coy (someone who’s a little reclusive and who plays hard to get).
2. Manipulative (someone who sends mixed signals and leaves you wondering if they are interested in you or not – basically a person who is into the power dynamics that come with a relationship, and who will ultimately have the upper hand, especially in seducing each other).
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Quotes - words to live your life by
A collection of quotes I have collected over the last 2 decades:
– Victor Borge
"Live neither in the past nor in the future, but let each day's work absorb all your interest, energy, and enthusiasm. The best preparation for tomorrow is to do today's work superbly well." - Sir William Osler
"Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." - Bob Marley
"laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go of what you can't change. kiss slowly. play hard. forgive quickly. take chances, give everything, and have no regrets. life is too short to be anything but happy."
"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before, she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.” - Bob Marley
"It is necessary to try to surpass oneself always; this occupation ought to last as long as life itself." - Queen Christina
"I am always doing that which I can not do, in order that I may learn how to do it." - Pablo Picasso
"He who cannot change the very fabric of his thought will never be able to change reality." - Anwar Al-sadat
"Maybe our favorite quotations say more about us than about the stories and people we're quoting." - John Green
"Laughter is the closest distance between two people."
– Victor Borge
"Live neither in the past nor in the future, but let each day's work absorb all your interest, energy, and enthusiasm. The best preparation for tomorrow is to do today's work superbly well." - Sir William Osler
"Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." - Bob Marley
"laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go of what you can't change. kiss slowly. play hard. forgive quickly. take chances, give everything, and have no regrets. life is too short to be anything but happy."
"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before, she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.” - Bob Marley
"It is necessary to try to surpass oneself always; this occupation ought to last as long as life itself." - Queen Christina
"I am always doing that which I can not do, in order that I may learn how to do it." - Pablo Picasso
"He who cannot change the very fabric of his thought will never be able to change reality." - Anwar Al-sadat
"We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid. So are regrets." - Marilyn Monroe
"No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars or sailed an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit." – Helen Keller
"The great man is he who does not lose his childlike heart." - Mencius
"You may not always know what you've got until you lose it, but you truly never know what you've been missing until it arrives"
"Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule." – Samuel Butler
"Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else." - Judy Garland
"Life is about now knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity." - Gilda Radner
"Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule." – Samuel Butler
"Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else." - Judy Garland
"Life is about now knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity." - Gilda Radner
"Sometimes when you let go of control you find happiness."
"In life it’s all about the flow, find your rhythm and you’ll be unstoppable”
"In the heart of every man is a desperate desire for a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to rescue" - John Eldredge
"In the heart of every man is a desperate desire for a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to rescue" - John Eldredge
"Life is about making mistakes, and death is about wishing you made a whole lot more."
"Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit."
– Peter Ustinov
“True love is one’s recognition of their counterpart in another.”
"Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit."
– Peter Ustinov
“True love is one’s recognition of their counterpart in another.”
"I will find you. No matter how long it takes, no matter how far--I will find you." -Nathaniel to Cora in The Last of the Mohicans
"To think is easy. To act is difficult. To act as one thinks is the most difficult." – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
"Fear defeats more people than any other one thing in the world." – Ralph Waldo Emerson
"If you haven't forgiven yourself something, how can you forgive others?" – Dolores Huerta
"The art of living lies less in eliminating our troubles than in growing with them." – Bernard Baruch
"Never give out while there is hope; but hope not beyond reason, for that shows more desire than judgment."
– William Penn
"Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision." – Peter Drucker
"Most people are so busy knocking themselves out trying to do everything they think they should do, they never get around to do what they want to do." – Kathleen Winsor
"Were the diver to think on the jaws of the shark, he would never lay hands on the precious pearl." – Saadi
"Calm self-confidence is as far from conceit as the desire to earn a decent living is remote from greed."
– Channing Pollack
"When you get into a tight place and it seems that you can't go on, hold on — for that's just the place and the time that the tide will turn." – Harriet Beecher Stowe
"We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be." – Kurt Vonnegut
"Laughter is the closest distance between two people." – Victor Borge
"I have always believed that whatever good or bad fortune may come our way we can always give it meaning and transform it into something of value." – Hermann Hesse
"All that is necessary to break the spell of inertia and frustration is this: Act as if it were impossible to fail."
– Dorothea Brande
"It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are." – e. e. cummings
"Be generous, be delicate, and always pursue the prize." – Henry James
"In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted." – Bertrand Russell
"We should be too big to take offense and too noble to give it." – Abraham Lincoln
"Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus."
– Alexander Graham Bell
"The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather in a lack of will." – Vincent Lombardi
"Within us all there are wells of thought and dynamos of energy which are not suspected until emergencies arise." – Thomas J. Watson
"If we wait for the moment when everything is ready, we shall never begin." – Ivan Turgenev
"We must live as we think, otherwise we shall end up by thinking as we have lived." – Paul Bourget
"It is the nature of man to rise to greatness if greatness is expected of him." – John Steinbeck
"Our real blessings often appear to us in the shape of pains, losses and disappointments, but let us have patience and we soon shall see them in their proper figures." – Joseph Addison
"Consistency is only a paste jewel that cheap men cherish." – William Allen White
"Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained."
– Marie Curie
"You desire to know the art of living, my friend? It is contained in one phrase: make use of suffering."
– From Henri Frederic Amiel
"Trust your hunches. They're usually based on facts filed away just below the conscious level."
– Dr. Joyce Brothers
"It is never safe to look into the future with eyes of fear." – Edward Henry Harriman
"Action is the antidote to despair." – Joan Baez
"In things pertaining to enthusiasm, no man is sane who does not know how to be insane on proper occasions." – Henry Ward Beecher
"It is good to act as if. It is even better to grow to the point where it is no longer an act."
– Charles Caleb Colton
"Your life becomes the thing you have decided it shall be." – Raymond Charles Barker
"It is wisdom to believe the heart." – George Santayana
"A person who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." – Albert Einstein
"None will improve your lot if you yourself do not." – Bertolt Brecht
"One day in retrospect the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful."
– Sigmund Freud
"Pain is a part of being alive, and we need to learn that. Pain does not last forever, nor is it necessarily unbeatable, and we need to be taught that." – Harold Kushner
"Put your heart, mind, intellect, and soul even to your smallest acts. This is the secret of success."
– Swami Sivananda Saraswati
"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on." – Franklin Delano Roosevelt
"I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It is there all the time." – Anna Freud
"Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood." – Marie Curie
"We arrive at the truth, not by the reason only, but also by the heart." – Blaise Pascal
"There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do."
– Freya Stark
"Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing until it gets there."
– Josh Billings
"Luck? I don't know anything about luck. I've never banked on it and I'm afraid of people who do. Luck to me is something else: hard work — and realizing what is opportunity and what isn't." – Lucille Ball
"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face." – Elanor Roosevelt
"Never look down to test the ground before taking your next step; only he who keeps his eye fixed on the far horizon will find the right road." – Dag Hammarskjöld
"Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones." – Phillips Brooks
"Always behave like a duck — keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil underneath."
– Jacob Braude
"Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out."– James Bryant Conant
"Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience." – Victoria Holt
"It is a mistake to try to look too far ahead. The chain of destiny can only be grasped one link at a time."
– Winston Churchill
"To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe."
– Anatole France
"The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling... And even more beautiful, is knowing that you are the reason behind it!"
"good is the enemy of great"
"Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it." — Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love)
"It's not about how hard you can hit, but how hard you can get hit and still keep moving forward." - Rocky Balboa
"You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it."
– Robin Williams
"I've got to say no to the good so I can say yes to the best." - Zig Ziglar
"It is better to make new mistakes than it is to repeat the old ones."
"Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." – Henry Van Dyke
"We gain a lot of ground because we both give a little. There ain't no road too long when we meet in the middle." - Diamond Rio
"I can't give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: Try to please everybody all the time." – Herbert Bayard Swope
"I can't give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: Try to please everybody all the time." – Herbert Bayard Swope
"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Proverbs 15:1
FRANK SINATRA - Young-at-Heart
Fairy tales can come true, it can happen to youIf you're young at heart
For it's hard, you will find, to be narrow of mind
If you're young at heart
You can go to extremes with impossible schemes
You can laugh when your dreams fall apart at the seams
And life gets more exciting with each passing day
And love is either in your heart or on its way
Don't you know that it's worth every treasure on Earth
To be young at heart
For as rich as you are it's much better by far
To be young at heart
And if you should survive to 105
Look at all you'll derive out of being alive
Then here is the best part
You have a head start
If you are among the very young at heart
And if you should survive to 105
Look at all you'll derive out of being alive
Then here is the best part
You have a head start
If you are among the very young at heart
The older I get the less I listen to what people say and the more I look at what they do.
- Andrew Carnegie
Integrity is the glue that holds our way of life together.
“our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” – Thomas Edison
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